Lubna Alli

Today I was thinking back to my weekend trip to Milan and of the amazing service and sense of family that I felt at a local cafe that became a favourite of my friends and I. This particular cafe, albeit not very Italian in nature, had a certain charm to it, a big portion of that credited to it’s very hospitable owners. There was an ambiance there that was the perfect mix of Italian culture and Canadian culture. We originally sought it out in search for a hearty North American style breakfast, something we’d been deprived of since arriving in Italy.There were only so many cappuccinos and cornettos we could have before we got sick of it. We were on a hunt for scrambled eggs, toast, hash browns and pancakes! When we found this place we felt like we hit the jackpot! The owners, a seemingly well traveled husband and wife, greeted us and took the care to go through the menu with us, giving us recommendations as we went along. I was recommended hot milk and honey for my sore throat, and my friend apple pancakes instead of regular, both of which were phenomenal!

As they made our food, I remember watching in keen silence the way they interacted with each other, each with their own space and each doing their due diligence behind the counter. He never interrupted her and she never him. They were in sync, peaceful, calm, and this energy seem to resonate in the cafe, all patrons just as tranquil.

My friends and I were so pleased with our blend of North American style breakfast and Italian style service that we struck up a conversation with the owners, who were already friendly to begin with. They told us that they were born an raised in Italy and had previously lived in England, and that they wanted to make Toronto their next home. How exciting! We grilled them about Italian culture and politics and they dished the responses equally as easy as the questions came pouring. So, this is what it feels like to get to know the locals I thought to myself. What a wonderful feeling to get the inside scoop!

In conversation with the owners, we learned that they were born an raised in Italy and had previously lived in England, and that they wanted to make Toronto their next home. We grilled them about Italian culture and politics and they dished the responses equally as easy as the questions came pouring. Finally we were exchanging what felt like valuable conversation with locals. The gist of most of our other exchanges with locals (who viewed us as “Americanos”) usually veered in the direction of cheap pick up lines and simple flirty exchanges inciting us to have drinks, share a dance or even cook us dinner. This just felt different, more real.

This experience really does justify Hofsteade’s theory about in-group collectivism because I realized the pride, loyalty and cohesiveness there is in organizations and families. The one comment that my friends and I constantly made of the place was that it reminded us of home and our families. The morning that they packed our lunches away for us invoked the most feelings of family, comparable to the feeling of a mom and dad packing your lunch for you before school and wishing you good day. Within the cafe itself, I sat and watched the husband and wife interact with each other as they tended to customers. They had outstanding cohesion and communication skills, picking up each other’s slack when needed. They were a team, an organization, a family. My, what impressionable people! Whenever I am Milan next and feeling a piece of home, I know where to go to get my pick me up!

Content,

Lubna